It’s Valentines Day so it only seems right to share this post with you all. I wrote it a few weeks ago but thought I would save it for the day we are supposed to declare our love to the special people in our lives. As a couple we don’t celebrate Valentines Day, we might just have a special date night but no soppy presents will be exchanged as Ant tends to spoil me we tend to spoil each other all year round so instead this seems the perfect way to celebrate Ant and my love for him.
We’ve been married for two and a half years now. I am someone’s wife. I’m not even a grown up yet sure I’m not sure how this all happened, but happen it did.
They say the first year of marriage is the hardest and for us our first year of being newly weds threw all sorts of shit at us and was definitely a challenge to say the least. Then life threw even more at us for the year and a half after that right up until present day when we seem to be still wading through it. Seriously our life feels a little bit surreal at the moment with everything that is happening.
There are a few things that have happened/are happening that I can’t and don’t want to get into but to give you a small snippet of the last two and a half years there has been, a stroke, breast cancer, death of two grandparents, severe Alzheimer’s and my mum developing some long term health conditions leaving her in a lot of pain and requiring 2 operations and a shoulder replacement in a couple of months.
These are quite literally just the tip of the iceberg. It’s been complete and utter crap but I am an optimist and really good at seeing the best in every day. Luckily the good is still heavily outweighing the bad and so I’m still feeling very positive about life.
The true silver lining of all this drama in our family has been that despite testing both myself and Ant, putting us both at the end of our tether and leaving us feeling completely broken at times, it has also shown us that together we are definitely stronger.
I couldn’t have got through everything without Ant standing by my side, holding my hand, giving me a shoulder to cry on and an ear to rant into. He has been me rock and when I’ve felt like I’m paddling like crazy, straight into the tide he’s been holding my head above water and helping me stay afloat.
Yes, there are times when he drives me bonkers and I know I drive him mad at times too. Yes, we squabble and bicker over ridiculously silly things and yes, we are far from the ‘perfect’ couple but none of that matters.
What matters is that when I really need him, when I’m falling apart, he’s there picking up the pieces and putting them back together quicker than I ever could on my own.
When I said ‘I do’, I said it because he makes me laugh, he’s my best friend, we have similar taste in things and we are nerdy together (him more than me). Plus he is a brilliant father to my son.
I said ‘I do’ because I couldn’t imagine being with anyone else and not having him in my life.
I said ‘I do’ because I love him.
The time that has passed since I said those two words has proved to me beyond doubt that I completely made the correct choice in my husband, and despite fate putting us in situations we have never had to deal with before, he’s stepped up to the mark every time and never let me down when I’ve needed him, ensuring that I know for sure that when I said I do, I chose well.
I honestly think that if the first few years of marriage are anything to go by, we are pretty indestructible as a couple and it’s going to be very hard to break us.
He will always be my Valentine. I couldn’t ask for a better husband and father to my child and I only hope I am proving to be the wife he deserves.